1 Don't spend more time on Facebook than you should. How much time is that? It depends on what your spouse says. Communicate with your spouse and ask them, "Am I spending too much time online?" You want to make sure your spouse is your #1 relationship, not your buddies on Facebook. Pursue your spouse more than you pursue online relationships. Don't Facebook during "couple" time.
2) Never hide things from your spouse on Facebook. Openness and honesty is the glue of your marriage. When you start hiding friendships, conversations, chat sessions and comments from your spouse, that is unhealthy. If you're not allowing your spouse to know what you're doing on Facebook or online, that's a sign that you're doing something you shouldn't be doing.
3) Share your Facebook password with your spouse. This includes every password from Facebook account to every email address. It's called trust and accountability. Knowing you or your spouse can open up the laptop at anytime and read anything or see any place you've gone, keeps spouses accountable. Don't hide things from your spouse. Make sure you regularly tell them, "You are welcome to see what I'm doing anytime."
4) Never befriend anyone of the opposite sex that your spouse is uncomfortable with. Think twice before befriending an old boyfriend or girlfriend. Simple communication with your spouse about this is best.
5) Defriend anyone who crosses normal boundaries. If someone is saying things, doing things or asking questions online that make you uncomfortable OR would make you uncomfortable in person, then that's not a good sign. Listen to the little voice in your head. If something tells you "this isn't right," then it's probably not. Never be ashamed or afraid to defriend someone that may have ulterior motives.
6) If you're married, PROUDLY set your Relationship Status" to married. I wish there was a "Happily Married" status or, for that matter, an "I'm madly in love with my incredible mate".
7) Post pictures of you and your spouse on your Facebook, or use a "couple" picture as your profile picture.
8) Don't be afraid to proclaim your love for your spouse on Facebook. Someone of the opposite sex won't question your love for your spouse if you occasionally brag on your spouse on your Facebook status. It's healthy to brag on your spouse, and occasionally doing it in public conveys your love for your spouse to the world. At the same time, NEVER use your status to complain about your spouse.....Not smart!
9) Think before you type. Don't make comments on statuses and pictures of other people that come across as suggestive.
10) No matter how many friends you have on Facebook, remember that your #1 friend should be your spouse. Strive to better that relationship on a daily basis. Work 1000 times harder to grow in your marriage relationship than you do at finding friends on Facebook. NEVER take your relationship with your spouse for granted. The last thing you want is 1000 Facebook friends, while the love between you and your best friend slowly dies out.
1 comment:
Great list of rules for couples, and so important! I am seeing so many more issues with social networking sites, etc. in my marriage therapy pratice ...
www.ashortguidetoahappymarriage.com
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